Deidara and the Pekin Duck
by Roxius
Summary: Deidara is a master artist when it comes to explosions, but his drawing skills leave much to be desired. Please R & R!


Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.

A/N: I'm getting volumes 39 to 44 all at once, so possibly expect some new Naruto fics...hopefully...

* * *

"HA HA HA! CHECK IT OUT, UN!!!"

Sasori looked away from his newest puppet creation and saw that Deidara was apparently forcing some crude tablet into his face.

"...What is this?" The puppet master asked.

"It's my newest piece of artwork, un! No bombs involved this time! I'm going to prove to the world that I am a master artist no matter what medium I use to create!!" Deidara exclaimed proudly, "Check it out...un!!"

Sasori sighed, and took the picture from the blonde man. He stared at it for a good five minutes. Deidara bit his lower lip in anticipation; just how would his partner react to his art?

"...It's a pretty good fire truck." Sasori stated as he handed the picture back to Deidara, who promptly smacked him in the back of the head.

"BAKA!! It's a duck, dumbass!! It's a duck!!!"

Sasori blinked twice, and leaned closer to get a better look at the picture. "...That's a duck?"

"YES! IT'S A DUCK!!!" Deidara screamed, his pale face turning bright red. Sasori frowned.

"...Duck?"

"Yes!!"

"...Not a fire truck?"

"No, it's not!!!"

Sasori stood back up straight, and shrugged his ball-jointed shoulders. "...I keep staring at it and...it just looks like a fire truck to me..."

Deidara was just about ready to tear his own hair out. "YOU'RE BLIND TO REAL ART, UN!!! I'LL GO AND ASK THE OTHERS TO SEE WHAT THEY THINK ABOUT IT!!!"

"...Good luck with that..." Sasori mumbled as he watched Deidara storm off, leaving behind tiny exploding clay birds in his wake...

* * *

"KISAME-SAN!!! KISAME-SAN!!!"

Kisame Hoshigaki sighed and stood up from the couch, fully prepared to leave before Deidara could catch up to him. He really didn't like talking to the other Akatsuki members besides Itachi, and Deidara was his least favorite, especially after that whole incident with Deidara's exploding clay and Kisame's prized barracuda. However, the blonde had soon latched himself onto the water ninja's back, so Kisame had no choice but to stand there and listen.

"Kisame-san...what do you think of my newest piece of extravagant artwork, un?!" Deidara declared, shoving the picture in the fish-man's face.

Sighing, Kisame took it from him and looked it over. After a minute, he pressed a finger to his upper lip as he stated, "...Wow...you may be a little bitch sometimes, but you do a damn good Mona Lisa, I'll give ya that..."

"...MONA LISA?!!!"

"Yeah...I mean, here's her smile, and her hair, and those beautiful, soulless eyes of hers...can I take this to bed with me, kid? I LOVE fine art.....................................you get the joke, right?"

Infuriated, Deidara snatched the picture out of Kisame's cerulean-blue hands and ran off to find his next art critic; hopefully it'll be one who can actually realize that what Deidara had drawn was just a simple duck, nothing more, nothing less...

* * *

"Hey, Itachi-kun!! I got a question for ya, un!!!"

"...Yes?"

"...Wait, I hate you! Never mind then...un..."

"...This is the third time that's happened today..."

* * *

Hidan and Kakuzu were coming out of the bedroom together, flustered and half-dressed, when Deidara came running up to them.

"CHECK IT OUT, UN!!!" Deidara roared as he flung the picture in their direction.

Hidan caught it effortlessly in mid-air, and the two Akatsuki members stared at it for about 30 seconds. Deidara was nearly about to piss his pants with anxiety of wanting to hear their critique on his art.

"...It does not have monetary value, so I care nothing for it..." Kakuzu murmured.

"Hey..." a big smile graced Hidan's lips, "This is a really good drawing of a duck!!"

Deidara couldn't believe it; someone finally saw that it was actually a drawing of a duck! "You...you really like it, un?!"

Hidan nodded, still grinning from ear to ear. "Yeah...I mean, Buffleheads are so goddamn cute!! I love this!!! Can I hang it on my bedroom wall?! I'll pay ya with some of Kakuzu's cash!"

"HEY!!!"

All of the happiness Deidara had just felt at that moment vanished. "B...B...Bufflehead...?"

"Yeah! This is a Bufflehead, isn't it...?"

Without warning, Deidara punched Hidan across the face, grabbed the picture, and ran off down the hallway, screaming, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...UN!!!!"

It was actually a picture of a Pekin duck.

* * *

The instant Konan laid her eyes upon Diedara's picture, she let out a cry of disgust.

"YOU PERVERT!!!" Konan screeched, smacking Deidara across the face.

"W-What did I do, un?!" Deidara cried.

"How dare you just come in here and show me a very detailed anatomy of the female sex organs!!!" Konan threw the picture against Deidara's chest, and spat at his feet.

Deidara blinked once, and glanced at his picture for a split-second before looking back at Konan again. "It's...it's a picture of a Pekin duck, un..."

Konan gasped. "THEN YOU PURPOSELY MADE ME THINK IT WAS A PICTURE OF A VAGINA?! YOU BASTARD!!! HOW DARE YOU TRICK ME!!" She slapped Deidara across the face again.

Deidara eventually gave up on trying to convince her, and he quickly crawled away before any further damage could be done to his beautiful bishounen face...

* * *

"...Pein-sama?" Deidara wearily raised the picture just enough for the Akatsuki leader to see it.

Pein grinned. "...Nice picture of Son Goku you got there, Deidara..."

".................................................................................................FUCK YOU ALL, UN..." Deidara muttered as he fell to the ground, thoroughly defeated.

"Same here, buddy, same here..."


End file.
